I cockslap morals
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
it hurts more in the daytime
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
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