What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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