the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
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