hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
It all started with a game of naked twister.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Randomize
