I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize