there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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