If you die in college, do you die in real life?
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize