Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
where are you?
Hypothermia
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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