You made me cry and you don't even care
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
