she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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