i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
