Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
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