oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
