Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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