brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Don't EVER smell your tampon
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
