We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize