We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Sober January is a disaster.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Randomize
