I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize