Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
jump out the window naked night went bad
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