that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
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