Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Just invented taco cereal.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
