You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
