Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize