yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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