Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Randomize
