so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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