If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Randomize
