I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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