Got a toothbrush?
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
