In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
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