Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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