found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
