His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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