My cat gives me a boner
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
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