she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize