dude i'm inner monologue high
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
