well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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