What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Randomize
