When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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