Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
