Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
