Having a random hookup so left but love u
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
We left an ass print on the piano.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I believe in your delicious
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
