Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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