Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize
