I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
