my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
