there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Randomize
