If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
