You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
