Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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